When expectations grow faster than income

50 years ago, in the 1970's, India was much poorer than today. Farmers were the majority of the population. Most lived in huts. Those who had a proper roof and steady income were considered outliers. Villages just had only one Govt. school to provide education. Only Doctors and Police Inspectors drove Bullets and it made sense. People hardly traveled. Even when they had to, they were content sleeping in the corridors of a temple and taking bath in the local river. Lodging and hotels were not big businesses during those times. People at large did not waste money on them. Gadgets that consumed electricity were rarely used. A movie in a tent theater and largely local gossip were the major avenues for entertainment. But the strange thing is, despite the lack of comforts, people hardly complained about their lives. 

Watch movies, read novels produced in those decades, you don't get to see people feeling bad about their lives. Being poor hardly mattered for them. Protagonists in the movies rather fought to uphold family values. Majority of the population did not repent the hardships they had to go through. In other words, people were poor but content. But things do not remain the same. They change. And there was one big change. 

That was expectations from life. 

Usually, expectations are set by our parents and influenced by the neighborhood we live in and the immediate relatives and friends we mingle with. The society we live in has seen lots of economic progress. Higher incomes gave higher buying power. Now every family has a 2-wheeler. Lots of them drive cars. Some frequently go to airports for their travel. Majority of us take vacations and we don't sleep in open spaces. The money we earn gives that affordability.

Technology further propelled the consumerism. Earlier we had trouble when our neighbor bought a new luxury car. Now the social media sends notifications about the new possession of an old and forgotten friend. Our LinkedIn profile sets our social pecking order. If you have not traveled overseas, you are as good as an uneducated man. Watch James Bond movies, it is more about gadgets than bravery now. Many of my NRI friends have bought land in Bangalore just for the fear of missing out (FOMO). My neighbor has built a 4-storey house for a family of 4. That home is likely to remain underutilized and rather become a space for the hoarding habits of its owner.

Stare at your wardrobe and shoe-stand and compare it with what you had forty years ago. There is a stark difference, but your wish list is not complete yet. Compared to what you had in your childhood, you have lots of comforts now. You are much richer, but you are not content. Your income has multiplied, but the expectations grew much more rapidly and it took the peace out of your life. Buddha declared two thousand years ago that 'Higher the expectations, higher is the dissatisfaction in life'. Now the whole society is in the tight grip of higher expectations.

If you want to live a simple, minimal life, it is difficult to do so. Society of today's time does not have tolerance for such people. They will label you as a loser. Your own children won't respect you as you are not a person to look up to anymore. Your wife would be troubled with her bad luck. Your friends can't understand why you are losing out. 

When expectations grow faster than income, you will never be able to have a satisfied life. Only way out is pruning your expectations despite the risk of being labeled a loser. I am embracing that risk my friend. You might have noticed that I am out of FaceBook already. I decided to get my old car repaired instead of upgrading. I am not a hero to my sons anymore and an utter failure in my wife's eyes. I am constantly losing my friends and the trend will only aggravate. It does not matter. I am out of the treadmill. I don't have to keep running.

I suppose Buddha was an idiot before he had become Buddha. It took twelve years of mediation for him to understand that higher expectations ruin your life. I and you don't lack common sense. I think we can learn to trim our expectations and lead a comfortable life. Peace makes up for the loss of societal respect and approval. Period.